Friday, June 26, 2009

Girlieman of the Week: Perez Hilton

From Politically Incorrect Gazette --

Girlieman of the Week

Date Awarded: June 26, 2009

Girlieman: Perez Hilton

Girlie Antics: Dishes it out, but can’t take it.

If you’ve never heard of a music wrangler named - this is not a typo - Will.I.Am, don’t feel like the Lone Ranger. He, is, I recently learned, a member of the group Back-Eyed Peas. It’s that latter fact which put Will.I.Am on the pink panty wearing radar of that GLAAD BAAG rump ranger, Perez Hilton.

Full of himself, and it, after derailing the aspirations of Carrie Prejean, during the Miss USA pageant, this prancing pimple on humanity’s butt, started sniping at the Black-Eyed Peas and their lead singer, Fergie. Eventually, thanks to fickle fate, Perez crossed paths with Fergie’s bandmate, Will.I.Am., at a video awards show in Toronto (Cana-DUH).

During the ensuing exchange of pleasantries, Will.I.Am, told Perez to lay off Fergie. Feeling smug and snarky, Perez called Will.I.Am a "faggot". By the time the dust finally settled, the Black-Eyed Peas manager, Polo Molina, had - by Hilton’s count - punched him in the face, at least three times. Apparently, Polo needs to spend some time in the gym, because, despite taking several shots at Hilton, he barely left a mark on the caterwauling cretin’s face.

Marked or not, panty punk had a hissy fit, thinking, no doubt, that he’s qualified for what the Ace of Spades HQ folks call the ‘Girl Rule’. That would allow panty punk to say anything he wants, without, as Ace puts it "earning a one-way ticket to Shinerville". If that’s what Panty Punk Perez thought, he knows better, now.

Perez Hilton is the poster pussy for ‘dishes it out, but can’t take it’. He thinks he’s a ‘girl’, and thus immune to the normal repercussions that ensue when a man mouths off to the wrong dude, by spewing ‘fighting words’. Panty Punk, you’re a dude, but, if you keep up this crap, some dude is going to rectify that inconvenient biological truth. Since there’s nothing the FSOP can do to hasten that glorious, nadless, day, we do what we can by naming Perez Hilton the Politically Incorrect Gazette’s Girlieman of the Week.

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