Idiots of the Day

The two morons in the following post are great examples of why I strongly believe some people should not be allowed to breed.

Idiot of the Day #1

The Riverside Casino and Golf Resort in Iowa rewards their employees with a gift certificate and a free room for the night after one years employment. The casino promotes itself as "Just like being in Vegas."

Sounds like a pretty nice gift for the average working stiff, but this where it went all down hill for Idiot #1 - Neil Jorgensen. Literally ready to party like a rock star in Vegas, the escapades of the62 yr old Jorgensen on this special night out will leave you in awe.

Neil must have never heard Dean Wormer's (Animal House) advice....

Fat, Dumb & Drunk is no way to go through life!

After a nice night on the town, drinking, eating, more drinking, gambling & drinking a little more, Jorgensen retired to his room. Quite possibly he hit the wrong button on the TV, seen some hot blonde screaming - Do me King! (oops - sorry my dream) he decided to sample some of the other wares in the "Vegas" like resort.

Feeling he had some pull in the casino and not wanting to "pull it" himself, Neil was now ready to get his groove on - Vegas Style! So with pecker in hand the pecker head called down to the front desk asking them to help him hire a prostitute. After eating Viagra like breath mints and sure as hell he was in Vegas, old dude wanted to party!

Neil refused to accept the first NO and kept calling....

Hotel workers were sent to Jorgensen's room to ask him to stop demanding prostitutes. When they arrived at his room, Jorgensen answered the door in the nude, human resources director Tim Donovan said.

Neil and his Jumping Jimmy got fired and they ended up in the unemployment line. And if above was not enough, this is where Neil takes the cake....

"The advertisement is that it's just like Las Vegas, so I thought I was in Las Vegas," Jorgensen testified at a hearing regarding his request for unemployment benefits.

He also blamed the restaurant for serving him too much alcohol.

"I was absolutely plowed," he said.

Not to worry, even though his unemployment was refused and Neil never did get laid, it will be OK. Soon Neil will have whores all over him and will eventually get screwed. Yep, these whores will be wearing suits, will have passed the bar exam and be looking for a wrongful dismissal suit.

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Idiot of the Day #2 --

Looking for the dive of his life this Austrian ass-hat got his wishes!

A lawyer, Markus Groh, from Austria was visiting Fort Lauderdale, being a diving enthusiast he booked a trip to go diving with the finned version of one of his own - sharks!

But these were not just any sharks he would be swimming with. Groh was about to become shark bait for Tiger sharks and Hammerhead sharks, which in their natural state are considered to be aggressive.

Pretty cool you say? Where does the idiot part come in?

The company's Web site says it offers the opportunity to get "face to face" with sharks. The site explains that its hammerhead and tiger shark expeditions in the Bahamas are "unique shark trips ....

To ensure "the best results we will be 'chumming' the water with fish and fish parts," the Web site explains. "Consequently, there will be food in the water at the same time as the divers.

Throwing bloody chum in the water has the same effect on finned sharks as a 50 car pile up does on Personal Injury attorney's, the suited sharks of the legal world - it creates a feeding frenzy!

With his leg looking like a piece of tune, Groh's leg was served for lunch. Realizing one of their water wizard's leg just became part of the feeding frenzy, dive operators contacted the Coast Guard who in turn airlifted the now one legged lawyer Groh to the hospital where he expired.

Like it matters now or would make a difference, authorities are unsure what type of shark attacked Groh because unlike the suited sharks this finned one swam away without leaving a card.

Not to worry - the suited man-eaters have a plan! When they are done helping Idiot of the Day #1, they will be filing a class action lawsuit against sharks for causing the death of Groh. The basis of this class action suit will be - the main culprit was negligent for not knowing Groh's leg was not fish bait and all sharks have teeth!

(Pic from Feeble Minds)