Girlieman of the Week - John Edwards

From Politically Incorrect Gazette --

Girlieman of the Week
Date Awarded: August 1, 2008

Girlieman: John Edwards
Girlie Antics: Refusing to face the music.

He’s a United States senator. He thinks he’s got the right stuff to be commander-in-chief. He’s so full of himself that he used his wife’s battle with cancer as part of his quest for the Oval Office. When he was trampled on the campaign trail by the Messiah Barry juggernaut, John Edwards fussed with his Breck punk tresses and tried to land a spot as Messiah Barry’s running mate. He is, in short, an ambulance chasing piece of political punk crap who is a legend in his own mind.

John’s quest for political fame and glory hit a sizeable speed bump, this week, when a strike team from the National Enquirer staged an ambush at the Beverly Hilton hotel in Mexifornia. The National Enquirer shares all the spiffy details.

* At 9:45 p.m., Johnny boy is spotted entering the hotel. He avoids the lobby, goes down side stairs then emerges on the bottom floor. From there, he takes the elevator up to the floor, where his lover, Rielle Hunter, had reserved two rooms.

* Later, the Enquirer strike team spotted Johnny boy and Rielle leaving the hotel briefly, after which they returned to her room, together.

* At 2:40 a.m., the Enquirer strike team spotted Johnny boy trying to leave the hotel, unseen, after spending some quality time, alone, with Rielle in her room. That’s when the fun hit high gear:

‘...when he emerged alone from an elevator into the hotel basement he was greeted by several reporters from the NATIONAL ENQUIRER.

Senior NATIONAL ENQUIRER Reporter Alexander Hitchen asked Edwards why he was visiting Rielle and whether he was ready to confirm that he was the father of her baby.

Shocked to see a reporter, and without saying anything, Edwards ran up the stairs leading from the hotel basement to the lobby. But, spotting a photographer, he doubled back into the basement. As he emerged from the stairwell, reporter Butterfield questioned him about his hookup with Rielle.

Edwards did not answer and then ran into a nearby restroom. He stayed inside for about 15 minutes, refusing to answer questions from the NATIONAL ENQUIRER about what he was doing in the hotel. A group of hotel security men eventually escorted him from the men's room, while preventing the NATIONAL ENQUIRER reporters from following him out of the hotel.
Said reporter Hitchen: "After we confronted him about seeing Rielle, Edwards looked like a deer caught in headlights!...’ (National Enquirer)

We always knew that Johnny boy was scum, but we always qualified it with modifiers like ‘shyster’, ‘parasite coddling’ or ‘class warrior’. Obviously, we underestimated Johnny boy. While his wife is fighting cancer, Johnny boy is cheating on her with a woman who bears a disturbing resemblance to Prince Chuck’s horse-faced bride, Camilla. That’s low, even hypocritical, but it’s only moderately girlie. What sealed the deal on this award is running from the reporters, then hiding from them in the men’s room. His ultimate crime against manhood is lacking the nads to face the music, publically, by admitting his peccadillos. You’re a gutless wonder Johnny boy and that’s why you’re the Politically Incorrect Gazette’s Girlieman of the Week.